“If you are an approval addict, your behaviour is as easy to control as that of any other junkie. All a manipulator need do is a simple two-step process: Give you what you crave, and then threaten to take it away. Every drug dealer in the world plays this game.” -Harriet B. Braiker I don’t know if that quote resonates with you, but it sure makes a whole lot of sense to me. Deeply ingrained within all approval addicts — or addicts in general — is the lack of a sense of self. A lack of understanding of the self always leads us to believe that external approval and validation are the essential parts of holding together our identity. Have you ever wondered why someone as sweet and giving as you always end up in relationships (romantic, friendship, business.) with people who don’t understand or appreciate all that you do for them? And when things don’t go the way we want them to and that relationship fails to provide us with the feedback that we are “doing enough” or “accomplished enough” or “good enough” why we turn to external methods to preoccupy that discomfort? Approval addiction is a layered disease… View Post
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